The Dunce Cakes of our Family

Dear Diary,

I read the entry below a few days ago, and I wasn't sure what to think. Initially, its severely retarded approach to grammar and extremely bizarre content left me feeling violated; it was as if a hacker had somehow found their way into our blogspot. Surely, this could not be one of my children, as they are all well educated and versed in their use of the English language. . . .Right? And don't call me Shirley.

Lo and behold, "the BUNT cakes of our family" was written by the infamous Bike Seat Sniffer.

I capitalized BUNT because this BUNT represents BUNTing in baseball. Yes that's right. Baseball. You BUNT in baseball.

A BUNDT cake is a completely different concept, and spelling. Why do I know that? I'm not sure. Think it makes me sound fruity? Well, don't confront me. Confront the individual who had the audacity to use a baking term, AND spell it wrong.

Perhaps I'm being too harsh about this misspelling. However, after thinking about it, Bike Seat Sniffer Chaun thought he was so clever by finding and replacing words in an entry that originally took some thought and care to compose; he merely altered it and thought he had accomplished some sneaky, grand feat! That's like someone with 4 legs who decides to run the HALF marathon rather than the full marathon. . .congrats buddy. . .You beat everyone in an abbreviated race with 4 LEGS.

To top it off, the grammar was horrendous, rendering this entry, for the most part, nothing more than a part plagarized, part piece of garbage.

Hey Bike Seat Sniffer. . .here's a suggestion. Why don't you actually write an entry on your own? Why not write about things you actually know? Instead of writing about BUNDT cakes, why don't you write an entry describing how you go about sniffing bike seats in public venues, despite the scrutiny of the hidden cameras? Why don't you describe to us how you perform your perverted, disgusting acts in public locations, including fast food bathrooms?