Birthday-O's

Leslie, trying to enforce an aritificial, individual award ceremony for your birthday o clock is pointless bureaucracy. i could understand if you silently acknowledged it in your head, but when you profess it, i feel like i'm obligated to buy you a birthday o present. actually, i have no idea how i should feel. should i congratulate you? should i laugh? should i cheer and clap my hands with delight? what does it even mean? what does it mean to have a birthday o clock?

that's what i'm saying. i don't know what it means when you say "it's my birthday o clock." so if i plan to let you know when it's my birthday o clock, meaning it has intentions, does it mean the same thing as it just being a coincidence? it's like a horoscope. should i believe that i will laugh today? of course! if i were to put myself in that situation. but what does that even mean? and why should i acknowledge it?

________________________________________
From: Manboy [mailto:Xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 3:42 PM
To: Leslie Hammerwhacker
Cc: Peacil Mints
Subject: RE: batman

You’re saying that our counter to “birthday o’clock” is “pointless bureaucracy?”


Manboy
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From: Leslie Hammerwhacker [mailto:xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 3:40 PM
To: Manboy
Cc: Peacil Mints
Subject: Re: batman

You're muddling it all up with pointless bureaucracy. What is this 'count' you're talking about? will it count for what?

On Wed, Jul 16, 2008 at 3:26 PM, Manboy wrote:

Peacil,
You make good points… I think it's more of a point of having your "birthday o'anything" aka what your numbers are, on the top of your head, and of course you will notice them.
It's like driving down the street when you're looking for the address 1004… you're looking for it, so when you see it, you recognize it.
Congrats on being the stinky kid… I'm sure it'll come with a newfound respect from your co-workers…. Or something like that…

Manboy

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From: Peacil Mints [mailto:xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 3:24 PM

To: Manboy; Leslie Hammerwhacker
Subject: RE: batman

so does this have to be by chance or should i try to integrate my birthday o's? like what if i set my alarm tomorrow to send you an email at 9:17 am? that's an intentional birthday-o. does that count? or what if i decide to blow you away with a double whammy. . . by sending out an email at 9:17 am on 9/17? is that a double birthday-o? and have you ever taken into consideration army time? chances are, you haven't, because i've heard you profess your birthday o clock at 22:04. And technically, that's not your birthday-o. how does one account for that?
Manboy, i meant i'm the stinky kid for once because this time, i know that people know. there's no way they couldn't know. would i hold the title of stinky kid if nobody besides myself knew that i stunk? i mean, i left my cube with a trail of gas that smelled way worse than poop. . . and this woman walked up and tried to come into my cube to give me a card. i just snatched it out of her hand and bolted down the aisle. everyone proceeded to fill the aisle thereafter. busted. i am now the stinky kid.
________________________________________
From: Manboy [mailto:Xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 3:17 PM
To: Leslie Hammerwhacker; Peacil Mints
Subject: RE: batman

Hahahahahasld;k fj2r98 jd;slajkg tqg5jrz;xlc k90283 tfwedsxl;j
Manboy
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From: Leslie Hammerwhacker [mailto:xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 3:15 PM
To: Peacil Mints
Cc: Manboy
Subject: Re: batman

Manboy, that's fate! God wants you to know your birthday-o's!!!

On Wed, Jul 16, 2008 at 3:13 PM, Leslie Hammerwhacker wrote:

that's unfortunate that you have such an awkward birthday. But through the wonders of the hexadecimal system we all have a birthday-o'clock. The Cabooze is on 917 Cedar Ave. That's a pretty cool birthday-o'address. In essence Peacil, don't be insecure about your birthday-o's, you've just got to be creative and be aware. Sometimes I wait for my birthday o'clock now because it makes me happy to see it, but most of the time, i'm just going about my day and 1004 jumps out of nowhere and delights me like a little ejaculation you didn't know was coming (literally! HA!).

On Wed, Jul 16, 2008 at 3:06 PM, Peacil Mints wrote:

how would 0917 play out in the real world, aside from time? Rarely is a baseball game ever in the 17's scorewise. That means my chances are slim to none that I will ever get to see my birthday o score. I don't live on 917 munchalunch lane either. So i don't have a birthday o address. I can't shape my area into 0917. Therefore I don't have a birthday o dong. I think this birthday o club is merely a scheme for you to form an extremely exclusive club so you can pretend you're better than the rest of the world.
Manboy, remember when I had those fart bags that would inflate and explode, leaving an eggy, sulfuric smell everywhere? i'm literally farting that stuff. it's hot and it spreads like wildfire. i just cropdusted the aisle here, and i heard some women joke about how stinky it smells in here. hahqa43yj24^@$^@!!!!! for once, i'm the stinky kid!!!

________________________________________
From: Leslie Hammerwhacker [mailto:xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 12:04 PM
To: Manboy
Cc: Peacil Mints
Subject: Re: batman

I didn't say they are essential, but they are not trivial. They are a self declamation of being. And yes, they existed before digital clocks. But birthdays can be found in almost any series of numbers. if you're at a baseball game and the score is 10-4. Well that's my birthday-o'score. do you live on 1004 munchalunch lane? that's my birthday-o'address. did you twist your genitals to shape 1004? that's my birthday-o'dong. It's about claiming an identity and being comfortable enough to declare that wherever you are. and while that is not essential for being alive, it is important for living!


________________________________________
From: Peacil Mints [mailto:xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 11:01 AM
To: Manboy; Leslie Hammerwhacker
Subject: RE: batman

that brings me to the question that has been burning in all of our minds Leslie. before digital clocks, did birthday o clocks even exist? with something of such short history, how can we say that birthday o clocks are an integral part of life? almost all things that are paramount to our lifestyles have extensive histories. and those that do not, like cell phones for example, are slightly more valuable than birthday o clocks. if a day went by where you didn't see your birthday o clock, would it honestly hamper your lifestyle?


______________________________________
From: Peacil Mints [mailto:xxx]
Sent: Wednesday, July 16, 2008 10:46 AM
To: Leslie Hammerwhacker; Manboy
Subject: RE: batman


Leslie, i think, aside from this past weekend, i have never hung out with you where you have not mentioned your birthday o clock. i'm going to think of something trivial of the sort and say it everytime around you.